Spring is in the air... and so am I!

Let's not beat around the bush. 2010 sucked. I wasn't crazy about 2009, but I clearly didn't give it enough credit because it's successor brought everything but success for this DC Hawkeye. Health problems, financial problems, and working seven days a week was an unpleasant way to spend those 365 days. But I'm not here to complain about the past; I'm here to start 2011 off with a bang. There have been many wonderful changes in my life since December brought 2010 to a close and things are just now starting to settle down. Unfortunately, all the stress of the last year and the adjustment to starting a new job and changing my living situation has left me with a residual case of the blues. Drastic measures were needed. I didn't just need a little cheering up, I needed fun and excitement. I needed a reminder of how awesome life can be without even leaving the comfort of my own city. I needed to get active and rejuvenate my mind, my mood, my entire body. I needed trapeze.

Trapeze School New York (TSNY) has a permanent location in Washington, DC. Their flying trapeze classes are two of the most fun and exciting hours I have ever experienced. I took three classes back in 2009 (I told you 2010 sucked. It was a trapezeless year of my life, wasted.) I loved the trapeze from the first time I jumped off the platform and went soaring through the summer air. On March 17th of this year, I decided to climb out of my slump on St. Patrick's Day and up a 23-foot ladder to fly through the air once again.

I was nervous about getting back up there after so long, so I went through the entire ground school of instruction once again to get a refresher on all the safety guidelines. In 2009 I was on to learning my third trick, but I wasn't very confident after all of that time off so I decided to start with the first trick I ever learned (the knee hang) but by the end of class it had all come back to me and I was begging to try out my splits once again. The agreed and went over it with me once again. Eventually when I perfect the trick, I'll have someone on the next bar to catch me when I move from the split position. The video you see above is my first attempt at a split after my 18-month hiatus. It may not look like much on a tiny video file, but it felt fantastic!

I can't say that my case of the blues is completely cured, but it is definitely fading away. Flying on a trapeze is a great way to wake up your body and your mind. My body was awakened so much, it was practically screaming every time I moved a muscle the next two days. Ouch. I seriously need to start doing yoga this year.

Reflection and Perspective

I can't remember a time in my life when I didn't know how to read. If you ask my mother, she will probably tell you that as soon as the umbilical cord was severed, I read the hospital chart to learn my last name. Mothers are prone to exaggeration.

Exaggerations and proud parents aside, one of my earliest memories is before I began Kindergarten. The details of my memory are somewhat unreliable, but I believe it was an assessment before I started school. A young woman sat across from me and said, "When I say a word, I want you to repeat after me, okay?" I consented, eager to please. She began, "Okay, repeat after me. DOG." I quickly responded, "D-O-G." For whatever reason, I spelled the word instead of repeating it. As I remember it, it was an automatic reaction to her ridiculously easy exercise, but memory being unreliable I will not count out that this younger version of me was simply trying to show off. It is entirely possible that my aim was to impress the lady.

Whatever my intentions, the thing I remember next is her getting up immediately after I spelled the word and going over to talk to someone else. I was certain that I was in trouble. I hadn't followed directions. I was paralyzed in fear. I had screwed up and not followed directions and now they weren't going to let me into school. Oh how excited I was to finally begin school and right then I had just ruined it with the word dog. (or was it cat? Perhaps I spelled out a dog-cat-house trifecta and sent this woman off in a flurry.) As it turns out, I was not in trouble at all. I had impressed her with my superior spelling skills and the resulting discussion amongst grown ups was to discuss my accelerated reading skills. I was allowed to go to school after all. Kindergarten was a half day, beginning at noon. I spent the following years unable to understand why I couldn't begin every day at noon and revolting against anything that began before 11 a.m. This is something I still struggle with today.

There is a reason I have been reflecting upon my literary beginnings. I have to give credit (or blame?) to my good friend Paul on this one. Paul is an extremely talented writer and he has always encouraged me to continue to write and complimented my abilities to put words together - whether it be on a blog, in a million letters written back and forth, or (ideally) somewhere that people would actually pay money to read what I have written. The latter being unlikely without a great deal of work, I appreciate Paul's nudges to continue to keep my writing skills sharp in whatever way possible. Recently after reading my blog and learning of my financial shortcomings, he sent me words of encouragement. He reminded me to keep writing, and assured me that one day I would look back and see this period of my life as "character building."

I say this with full confidence that anyone who knows me will agree: If I had any more character, I would need to be described as "A character." I have gotten myself into more "character building" situations than I care to admit. But I can't deny that the difficult times have taught me a lot about myself, and those lessons are invaluable. So, considering Paul's advice and encouragement, I began to reflect upon my favorite books throughout my life.

When I consider the most influential books throughout my life, one theme is constantly repeated. Without question, the most inspiring book of my youth was A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith. As I read the story of Francie Nolan escaping the realities of her difficult young life through her imagination and love of reading, I escaped my own challenges and awkwardness. I was very young when I read Little Women by Louisa May Alcott and immediately felt a connection to Jo March as she read to her little sisters and felt a passion for writing. In my adult life, I was moved by Frank McCourt's memoir, Angela's Ashes. Again, I felt an emotional connection to the story about someone who survived unimaginable circumstances and poverty by relying on imagination and his natural storytelling ability. All of these books have such a special place in my heart, and each of them tells the story of someone who survives poverty by relying upon the strength of family, and the power of imagination.

As desperate as my financial situation feels, my life is privileged when compared to my literary heroes. To compare my challenges to theirs (and their respective authors) even in my current situation would be to celebrate my own prosperity. I may whine about my well-being, but I am far from tearing down the ceilings in my apartment to keep the fire going for heat. I face challenges, but I can not describe myself as suffering. For this, I gain strength from the perseverance shown by the characters in these books. And like them, I gain strength from the people around me.

I would never have had the courage to move to Washington, D.C. on my own and pursue a career if I did not have the strength of my friends and family back home. Sometimes the word "friends" is not strong enough, and the people in my life can only be described as family. Now that I am here, it is the new friendships I have made that encourages me to stay and find fulfillment in D.C. Even if it means working seven days a week, trying to climb a ladder that often doesn't appear to have steps, and to do whatever it takes to keep afloat in difficult financial times. It has been difficult, nearly impossible, to live within my means in my current situation. It is difficult when you don't have enough money to make ends meet. But I would not trade the people in my life for all the money in the world. My financial situation is coming together and will eventually be in order. I can live with these months of sacrifices and I can even stay positive if I keep reminding myself to rely on those two important things. The support of the people around me, and the power of the imagination. As long as I have my friends and family, I will never be alone. As long as I have my imagination, I will never be bored. Sometimes I just need to remind myself never to take either of those things for granted. And sometimes I need Paul to remind me. Thanks, Paul. And thanks to all of the people I am incredibly blessed to have in my life: My friends, my family, and my books.

Go ahead. Laugh!

I paid $11.57 for all of this food. In Washington, DC. Coupons are not just for soccer moms anymore, the student-loan-indebted are jumping on the bandwagon! (We prefer the term frugalista.)

For sale: Pride, Social Life, Socks

No fooling, this summer really is going by fast. Last month I wrote about my coming to terms with my student loan debt and deciding to live within my means. I'm happy to say that I've been consistent with that goal, but sad to say that it's going to be a long, long road. Here's an update as to how it's going:

I have always had a second job on the weekends. (Seriously, always! I can't remember when I ever had only one job.) So, I've taken on more weekend hours to try and make ends meet, but I question if this is a productive use of my time. I make a decent hourly wage, but still - it's an hourly wage at a retail store. It's fun because it's unpredictable. It's just not as much fun as, say, going to that movie I was invited to on Sunday. Or, going away to the beach for Labor Day weekend. (although I don't know how good of an idea that would be anyway. Thanks, Earl!) Or, if I was really doing well, I could even make it to watch two of my good friends get married back in Iowa City next month. Unfortunately, knowing all of my other options makes the shifts at the bookstore a bit depressing. Still, not as depressing as not being able to pay the rent. So there is that.

Also last month I received an eBay offer that will allow me to list up to 100 items between August 22 and September 7th with no listing fees. This is a great deal! Usually if you list something on eBay, even if it doesn't sell you are still stuck paying the listing fee - which can be anywhere from $.10 to I don't know how many dollars, depending on how much you ask for when you start the auction. I decided to take eBay up on this generous offer and I am going to sell 100 items. Well, I'm going to list 100 items. I don't know if they'll sell. I think by the time I get to item number 100 the title may be, "Box of keys that I don't know what they go to." Or, "Five socks I can not find the match to. Makes a great gift!!" So far I've listed over 60 items and I still have 40 left to go. I haven't even started to dig through my clothes yet, so I think I will spend Monday ransacking my apartment looking for things that I don't need. I think it has served me well to create a goal of 100 items. It seems like a lot, but I have so many books and movies that those will take up a good chunk. I also listed some back issues of magazines (and even sold a few!) and I found all kinds of things I don't use any more and they have been sitting around being ignored. Some of the DVDs I sold were hard to part with and I'm sure some of the remaining 40 items will be things I don't necessarily want to get rid of. But if I'm not using it, I may as well sell it. The goal of 100 items has also made me realize how much crap I have. I have a lot of stuff. So far I have $130 in my Paypal account and over $50 due from buyers who have not yet paid. I have a credit card with a revolving balance of $500 and I decided I'm putting every cent of the eBay money toward that one credit card. It would be slick if I could get $500 total for this junk and get rid of one burden in my life. Unfortunately I will be lucky if I get half of that. Still, it's progress. Plus, it will keep me from what could have been a potential career as a hoarder. So there's another side benefit of selling everything. There's always a bright side!

Along with the part-time job and the eBay goal, I have cut an unbelievable amount of spending in my life. I truly appreciate all of the bloggers out there who write about being frugal and spending money. I would list some of them here, but there are too many to list. I've been using an embarrassing amount of coupons for a young hipster, but it's really paid off. There are many blogs out there who are dedicated to matching up weekly grocery ads with coupons available. This makes using coupons so much less time-consuming! It works, too. This week I went to Safeway and came home with a loaf of bread, a bag of salad mix, three bananas, three bags of instant potatoes, two 12-oz. packages of Kraft singles, 8 individually wrapped packages of Lance crackers, 10-oz. Teriyaki sauce, four 8-oz. bags of Teddy Grahams, and a box of frozen pretzels for a total of $11.57. According to the receipt, I saved $25.60 between sale items and coupons. It's kind of amazing to see how much money you can save, but it does take a good amount of effort to plan ahead and it takes an even greater amount of humility to stand with a line of people behind you and having the cashier scan coupon- after coupon- after coupon. It doesn't feel quite as cool as hanging out at a happy hour and socializing with friends, but trust me - it comes at a fraction of the cost. The amount of money I've saved by cutting out drinking in bars and bringing my lunch every day to work is amazing. It's no wonder I ended up in this situation to begin with. I should have been doing this a long time ago. Perhaps I would not have ended up in this situation to begin with. But then, I'd be pretty miserable if I had always been this boring. It's the memories of shenanigans with friends that motivates me to get caught up on bills and enjoy my social life again. Anyway, I've found some great ways to cut corners and I think I may have to share them on this blog over the next few months. Even if I end up increasing my income like I need to, I'll still have to stay frugal through the end of the year. Which means I'm thinking about Christmas presents already and if you're on my Christmas list, you should begin not getting your hopes up immediately.

Where did July go?

Is it just me, or did there used to be a month between June and August? I remember it was called July and it was a fairly long month - one of those with 31 days. What ever happened to July? Did we skip it this year? It seems like it was just a month ago that I was freaking out at work over a huge project due on the first week of June. Now my calendar is telling me that Sunday is August 1st. Am I being punk'd? Did I buy a faulty calendar? Seriously, what happened to July?

I know this happens every summer. We say things like, "Summer went by fast this year" or "I don't remember it being this hot last year" or "Can you please remove your stroller from the top of my foot?" Oh no, wait - that last one is what I said this morning on the Metro train. It's tourist season again in DC!!

I wish I could tell you that the reason I haven't updated my blog much lately is because I'm living a super-exciting life in the fast lane. Well, I guess I could tell you that, but it would be a lie. It's quite the opposite, actually. I recently sat down and went over my budget and realized I've been living above my means. I am grateful to have a reliable source of income during these troubled times, but I recently took a good hard look at the bottom line and had to admit: it's time to come to terms with my student loan debt. It was much easier to defer the loans and ignore the interest statements. But it is a heavy weight on my shoulders and as long as I keep going out and spending money on other things, I'm always going to be carrying around the stress and pressure of debt.

I find myself in the same situation as many college graduates. The burden of student loan debt is incompatible with starting level wages. Add to that the fact that the last thing I want to do when I'm still young is to work hard and deny myself a social life so that I can make a dent in my loans. I think the grace period for student loans should be ten years before you even begin to pay them off. Of course this would kill you with the interest on them, but most college graduates still live like college students for several years after they get out of school. We eat the same ramen noodles, keep the same hand-me-down furniture, and most people I know that are a few years out of school still ask their parents for money. [note: As a general rule I do not ask my parents for money. That said: If my parents are reading this and wondering, I wouldn't turn it down if you offered.]

I am trying hard not to feel resentment toward my student loans and I would love to hear from anyone who has been through this and has stories to share about their experiences. I borrowed the money with full knowledge that I had to pay them back. I watched all the mandatory videos and read all the terms before I signed. I take responsibility and I am grateful for many things in life. I'm grateful for my current job security and I'm grateful that I was able to finish college and earn a degree. I realize that not everyone can say that. Now, I just need to figure out how to put it all in perspective and make a dent in my loans, pay the rest of my bills, and still maintain a social life. I was invited to a DC United game recently and I would have loved to go, but I had to decline the invitation. My standard answer is going to become, "I can't make it this time, but perhaps when I'm fifty..."

It's March!

I'm not gonna lie, I'm phoning it in this time because I haven't written in a while and I want to keep this up at least once a month. I have also found a new motivation to blog in the form of passive-aggressive voicemails from my father. "Hello? I don't know if you remember me, but this is your father... my phone number is..." Yeah, I get it Dad. I remember you - the guy who would never buy me a pony. Okay, okay - how many "Are you dead?" messages do I need to hear before I get my arse in gear and update my blog? Hopefully no more. I will do my best to pop in with an anecdote every now and then just to let you know I'm alive. Perhaps something like this little gem:

I try to avoid Dentists as much as I can, even after they tell me I have cavities. Since I don't have money, I just put it on my to-do list until a later date. When it hurts to brush my teeth, it starts to become a priority. It was way past time to just grab my wallet and head to the doctor. So I did.

I went to my dentist and told him it hurt and we went through the whole drill.
*tap*tap* does that hurt?
No
*tap*tap* how about there?
No
*tap*tap ho..
YEOOWWW! Yeah. That one hurt a little.

Turns out I had an exposed nerve. It didn't hurt unless something touched my molar right on the gumline. Something like a toothbrush or an evil masochistic dentist. Since there is a huge filling on that particular molar he said he'd pull out the filling and put a crown on it. If the crown doesn't cover the nerve and it still hurts for a couple months, I may need to go to an endodontist and get a root canal. Sounds expensive.

I thought about it for a couple of days and was not crazy about going through a couple months of pain to find out if I need a root canal. Since it already hurts like hell, the process of getting the crown done sounds more painful than a root canal. So, I jumped rank and went to an endodontist recommended by a coworker. Before I did anything with my molars and naked nerves, I wanted to consult with the endodontist. I went in before work one morning, went through the whole *tap*tap* nonsense again and here's how that conversation went:
Doc: If it hurts that much now, a crown isn't going to make it go away. I think you're going to need a root canal either way. Do you want to just do it now?
Me: *sigh* Yeah, I guess so.
Doc: [stands up] Okay. I'll go get the novacaine. It'll take you a few minutes to get numbed up and then we'll go in and...
Me: Whoa! You mean NOW now? Like, right now?
Doc: [reaching for a gigantic needle] Well yeah we have time. If you need some time to think about it you can make an appointment to come back.

I'm thinking - What the hell is this place? Jiffy Lube? You walk in and twenty minutes later you get a root canal? I came in on a Monday morning to find out if I needed a root canal. Then I expected to make an appointment. Perhaps mentally prepare myself for the agony that comes with oral surgery. Now I have this endodontist sharpening his needles getting ready to drill through my tooth? I am never comfortable in making snap decisions. Especially on something involving doctors or a great deal of money, and this happened to involve both. I sat there for a moment, breathed heavily and realized that I was eventually going to end up back in this chair one way or another. At least this way I didn't have to take more time off work. So, he gave me the novacaine shots, I sent a text message to a coworker:

Plz tell boss my appt. will take longer than expecting. Getting root canal today.

And then he did it. I got a root canal at the drop of a hat.

Hah! I finished up and it's still March! I'll be back next month!

Hockey hockey hockey

I have two tickets for tomorrow night's Capitals & Devils game and I can't wait. Last Saturday was the Capitals home opener and it was the saddest day of my life. Well, the saddest day in a long time anyway. I didn't have tickets to the game, I had no friends willing to pay any amount of money to watch hockey.

That wasn't the sad part, though. I was on the Metro going down to the bookstore around 6pm the night of the opener and I found myself surrounded by people in hockey jerseys and Capitals gear.

Hockey fans!
MY PEOPLE!!

I wanted to go so bad and I've been depressed about it ever since. I really need to meet some hockey fans out here.

While I haven't met any hockey fans in the last week, I did meet a New Jersey fan. I work with a native Jersey girl at the bookstore and eventually wore her down to go to the game, but the $25 seats were sold out and both of our budgets are pretty tight. I went on eBay to find some tickets and was nearly salivating. My Jersey girl friend is very independent and very responsible and I'm lucky that's the case. I kept finding great bargains like $120 seats for $90. I wanted lower level seats so bad I was salivating. In my irrational lust for great seats I would've had no problem maxing out my credit card for expensive tickets, taking a loss and selling the seat to my bookstore friend for $25.00. Luckily for my budget, cooler heads prevailed and she wasn't comfortable letting me pay the difference. We ended up buying $50 tickets for $30 a piece. We are both starting our careers and working at the bookstore part time to make ends meet, so even $30 stretches the budget a bit. But I don't care... I miss hockey. I also bought a pair of tickets for the game on the 28th, $19.99 for the pair.

This means I'll make it to at least 8 games this season. Anthony bought me a six-pack of tickets for graduation but I haven't picked out my seats yet. When I go tomorrow I'll look around and decide where I want to sit. I am not crazy about going to hockey games by myself. I love hockey too much, it'll be hard not to be able to nudge someone and say, "Did you see that!?!" Plus, I've been sitting next to J and Pops for so long, I'm not quite sure how other people will react to my random excited sounds. My cheers are completely spontaneous and involuntary, I hope I don't embarrass myself too much.

It'll be really different to watch an NHL game. It will be sad not to have all of my Quad City hockey friends to watch with. Instead of four rows from the ice I'll be more like 4 miles from the ice. Also, I need to learn how to be a Capitals fan. Right now I'm just a hockey fan, I want to see a good game more than I want to see the Caps win. Although I should probably mold myself into a Caps fan, just so I can fit in. I can only name about 2 players on the team, but GO CAPS!!

Hockey is finally here. Without having my friends and my old seats, the NHL is going to feel like a step down from minor league hockey. That's okay though. I'm just excited to be going to a game. Yay! Section 416 row H here I come!

I'm so excited for hockey. I don't know if I can get to sleep tonight.

Shhh... it's a secret!

Secret shopping, actually; or mystery shopping if you prefer. It sounds kinda' fun, but it is work and it usually doesn't pay much more than a free meal. I used to do it a lot when I lived in Iowa but not so much out here. It's usually not worthwhile to spend a couple hours and two or three bucks minimum to hop on the Metro for a free sandwich. Some of the companies have cool stuff like Six Flags visits, trips to the spa, or hotel stays; but it's not always worth it. You have to remember every painstaking detail about your visit and it can take a while to fill out the online surveys. Once I got a nasty email and a bad grade (yes, we get graded) because I didn't describe the outside lighting at a movie theater. Seriously, the lighting in the parking lot lowered my score. She was awfully picky for someone who was paying me in movie tickets and popcorn.

Last weekend I was checking for available shopping jobs and I saw that my local grocery store had a shop available. There was no cash payment, just some free groceries but it was the place I usually shop so I jumped on it. Well, apparently I jumped a little too quickly b/c instead of signing up for my local store, I signed up for a different location that wasn't even on the Metro line. I actually had no idea where this place was. Oops.

The logical thing to do would've been to contact the company and try to switch the locations. Instead, I illogically took responsibility for my mistake and decided to go shopping across town. That included studying the bus route to leave work and go to the store, and then from the store home - a 30-40 minute trip each way. The Metro fare and bus transfer made for a more expensive trip. Plus, did I mention? I had no idea where the hell I was going. My free groceries ended up being not so free. In fact, the picture above ended up costing me about $3.00 in cash, 90 minutes of my time, and a slight pain in my arse. I thought I was signing up for some free groceries from the store I was already going to. Instead, I clicked the wrong link on a website and ended up having to step outside of my comfort zone. It was definitely worth it.

It's kind of silly, but somehow going to a new grocery store made me realize how quickly I fell into a routine out here. I also remembered why I fell in love with this city so quickly.

I almost got onto the wrong bus, but I realized my mistake and apologized to the driver. The bus driver was really helpful, and other people on the bus were quick to offer directions. The weather was great, and it was such a pleasant walk through a new neighborhood. There really are some very friendly people here in DC. Maybe it's because they're used to tourists, but most people aren't only willing to help, they're forthcoming in offering to help.

It turns out I signed up to shop at the tiniest store in the area. My cabinets are unusually well stocked for the moment and they didn't have a lot of the things I needed. Since I didn't want to buy anything perishable before my long trip home, I ended up throwing some random things together and grabbing the treasures you see above. It was a big mix-up and I didn't get much out of it, but the reminder to break from my routine was a much-needed one. This city has so much to offer and I ride around underground every day, only to emerge to walk between the Metro stop and work; or the Metro stop and home. What a waste. I really need to get out more.